Birth, motherhood, pelvic health, Pregnancy, Prolapse

Pregnancy After Prolapse – Birth Story {Part 1}

Going into this pregnancy, after previously experiencing prolapse and having a pretty good idea that my birth of my first contributed significantly to that, labour and birth is what I was most worried about. I had discussed it previously with my PFPT before getting pregnant, and again during pregnancy. I wanted to do everything I could to mitigate any risk, while keeping things as ‘natural’ as possible. While I 100% respect some women’s decision to have a c-section after prolapse to mitigate risk, that just didn’t feel like the right choice for me.

Leading up to birth in the third trimester, I focused my movement practice on keeping my PF and TA engaged, but also allowing them both to relax when appropriate. This is something I struggled with baby number one, and I wanted to ensure I had balance between the two this time around. I did a birth prep course that focused on mindfulness and relaxation through labor and birth and really dialed in my alignment and breathing strategies to ensure my core unit was functioning optimally.

In addition, I planned on having a homebirth. For me, this was the option that would ensure I would be as relaxed as possible during labor and birth. Not stressing about rushing off to the hospital, not worrying about being on the hospital’s timeline, not feeling like I was ‘wasting a room’ if my labor didn’t go as fast as anticipated. These were all things I didn’t want to worry about. Being able to stay home, in my own environment and eat and drink my own food and have my family and things close by made all the difference. I had midwives who aligned with my values, and ensured to communicate them all of my worries, concerns and wishes.

My midwife team was amazing. They heard and validated all of my fears and concerns about birth, were accepting my my story of my previous birth all while reassuring me that this birth would be the birth I was hoping for. They assured me that birth is usually much easier the second time around, and seeing as I was in such a good frame of mind there was no reason to be worried or stressed. I did still have a degree of concern, though, because we all know birth is one of those things that has the potential to go completely differently than is planned. Luckily, that wasn’t the case for me.

I had my 39 week midwife appointment on a Wednesday. We chatted about how I was feeling, I mentioned that my mother in law was scheduled to arrive on that Saturday to help care for Nugget when the baby arrives and my midwife says ‘Ya, we were talking about it, Saturday would be a good day for you to have a baby!’ and we all laughed, because baby’s never follow a plan. As I left my appointment I joked that I would see them Saturday, and went on my way.

Saturday arrived and I woke to find I had lost my mucous plug with a bloody show. I made a note of it, but didn’t get too excited since it can sometimes take days or weeks for labor to start after the mucous plug is lost, and it can regenerate. We headed out the door that morning to run some errands and pick  up my mother in law at the airport. Riding in the van on the way to the airport, I was feeling some tightening, but riding in cars had brought on braxton hicks since about 34 weeks so, again, didn’t think much of it. We got home, and the tightenings continued, and they were pretty frequent, like every 5-7 minutes, but not painful and I could easily talk through them and no one around me really knew what was happening. Even still, I started to pay more attention to them and started keeping track of them.

I gave my husband the heads up on what was going on around 3 in the afternoon. I told him I wasn’t sure if ‘this was it’ yet, but I thought he should be in the loop. We decided to head out for a walk to the park and just enjoy some time with Nugget, because of the impending potential that this could be our last days as a family of 3. We had such a great afternoon, swinging on swings, letting Nugget run around and guide our walk, and just enjoying him. I’m so glad I was mindful enough to ask my mother in law to take a photo of us, I will always cherish this photo of some of our last moments of just the 3 of us.

family of 3 KCFITNESS

After we got home from our walk, I was more convinced that this was it. I had gotten up earlier than normal that day and we had been running around so I decided it would probably be a good idea to take a nap, in case things ramped up and I ended up being up all night like I was when Nugget was born. Before I did that, I gave my midwife a call just to let them know what was going on, they agreed that a nap was a great idea and asked me to call back when things started to intensify. I laid down and surprisingly I was able to fall asleep quite quickly despite the tightenings. I was able to sleep for about an hour, but when I woke I found that the tightenings had all but stopped. They had completely slowed down to 15-30 minutes apart, though they were a little stronger than previously and took a bit more of my attention when they did come. I was so grateful that my water hadn’t broke yet, because that meant I could labor as long as I needed to without worrying about potential complications. As a result, I wasn’t worried about things slowing down, and knew my body would allow my baby to come when she was ready.

{CONTINUED HERE}

 

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pelvic health, Pregnancy, Prolapse, Self Care

Pregnancy After Prolapse – The First Trimester

~Read where you left off here~

So the line was pink. I was officially pregnant. Again.

It happened so much faster than we had anticipated. It was no longer a debate of being ready, because ready or not, it was happening. One week after learning we were expecting our second little one, my husbands parents were scheduled to come for a visit. We debated whether or not to share the news, it was SO early after all, but we decided if this pregnancy ended prematurely, their support would be so needed, so we told them.

That just reinforced how great it was. They were ecstatic! Of course they were, what grandparents aren’t excited to learn they will be welcoming more grandchildren? I looked to my mother in law for support, my husband and his older brother are only 13 months apart after all. She reiterated what we already knew, it would be hard in the beginning, but so worth it. And we had planned it after all, it will all work out in the end!

Overall the first few weeks I felt pretty good. I still had energy, continued my workouts, and kept up with life. Things were great!

Then I was struck with vertigo.

I had cared for patients with vertigo, and knew it was awful, but I always thought they were over dramatic. But let me tell you, from first hand experience, it is all consuming. When you feel like the world around you is spinning, and closing your eyes just makes it worse, and you haven’t figured out what triggers it so it hits you randomly, it is hard. So hard. Even harder when you have a toddler to care for, and pregnancy nausea has hit. The vertigo was the worst in the morning, which, lucky for me, coincided with when I was feeling the most nauseated. The two just fed off each other and I felt awful. Caring for Nugget was even harder, because bending down or doing anything that required me moving my head out of vertical, set it off. Add that to nausea and it was a sure fire recipe for a trip to visit the porcelain throne. But I was lucky, after couple of weeks, it self-resolved. I didn’t really do much besides give into my salt cravings and drink as much water as I wanted.

But all the vomiting did a number on my core. The force required for that really puts some pressure on the pelvic floor, I now understand why some women leak when they throw up! I started having a lot of heaviness and discomfort. I freaked out. I was so worried that I was causing my prolapse to return and went to a pretty dark place. The combination of vertigo, with pelvic floor symptoms and exhaustion all added up to my headspace being all out of whack. I had a lot of very negative thoughts. There were many moments where I freaked out that I was damaging my body beyond repair. I even had really low moments where I hoped I would just miscarry so I could not worry about it anymore. I laid in bed crying, feeling like a terrible person and mother for wishing this very much planned, very much wanted, pregnancy away. The emotional turmoil you go through after being diagnosed with prolapse can really mess with you, and I didn’t realize how deeply, until then. It was like I was back to the day I was diagnosed, spiraling down a dark hole of ‘what ifs’, fearing I would never get out again.

I talked to some other moms they offered so much great support. They validated my feelings and helped me see what was really important – that I wanted this baby and I knew exactly what to do to get him or her here as safely as possible.

My symptoms waxed and waned over the next few weeks, and came to a peak around 11 weeks. I finally asked my prolapse support group, and they all suggested I talk to my pelvic floor physio. I mean, I knew I should, but I was in a bit of denial. I let my ego get the best of me, and thought I knew everything I possibly could, and there was nothing she could tell me that would help. But I emailed her anyway, and I am so glad I did. She replied quickly, and said it was totally normal to feel like that at the end of the first trimester. The uterus gets heavy, but has not come up above the pubic bone yet, so the entire weight of it is supported by the PF muscles. She reminded me to take it easy and it should pass, but to call her if I had any questions.

And she was right! Within a week, all my symptoms were gone! I even went on an 8 km hike up a mountain, and felt totally fine at the end and still the next day!

Then I was just tired.

So. So. Tired.

I never really noticed the exhaustion with Nugget, because I didn’t already have a kid and could sleep or nap whenever I wanted. Not the case when you have a 15 month old who gets up at 6 or 7 every morning. No sleeping in when you’re a parent, and even less so when your husband is working 6 or 7 days a week. This did not work out well with working nights. I work nights the majority of the time, and it was catching up with me. I started getting reflux to the point where I avoided eating because it felt like nothing ever left my stomach, I basically felt like my digestion came to a screeching halt. I started losing weight, which is the opposite of what you want to happen in pregnancy. Not to mention I was basically a zombie whenever I was not working. My poor toddler had the worst mom.

I talked to my midwife, and we agreed it would be best if I stopped working nights. I felt so guilty coming to that decision. I actually quite enjoy night shift! Plus, as a nurse, working nights is a bit of a badge of honor. I felt like I was being a baby by giving them up so early in my pregnancy, but I knew I had to do what was best for me and this baby.

It was like the clouds parted. I was finally sleeping at the same time every night, and sleeping through the night again. Before, with such a wonky sleep schedule, I was waking every couple hours because my body couldn’t figure out it’s rhythm. My reflux resolved, I had energy to exercise and play with Nugget again, and surprisingly my skin almost completely cleared up!

Moving into the second trimester, I finally started feeling like myself again.

{Click here to read about my 2nd & 3rd trimester experience}

Pregnancy After Prolapse (2)

fitness, motherhood, nutrition, Self Care

How I Revolutionized my Diet to Lose Weight and Love my Body

I’m a woman. I’ve always been tall (I was 5’6″ in 6th grade, at 12 years old), I have broad shoulders and wide hips. I take up space. I always have, I always will.

I haven’t always been okay with it.

I spent a lot of my adolescence wanting to be smaller. I was never the girl who could be at the top of the cheerleading pyramid, or the one the boys would pick up and spin around, because I was big. My bigness came with strength, I was always the one doing the lifting or carrying, at the bottom of the pyramid, the backbone of the red rover team. As a young girl, I felt self-conscious about this. Girls are ‘supposed’ to be weak, and tiny and need big strong boys to take care of them.

I was also lucky to have parent’s who didn’t care about what girls are ‘supposed’ to be. My dad taught me to chop wood, and fish and hunt. My brothers and I almost always had the same expectations when it came to chores and helping out. At home, my bigness was never an issue, my strength was something to be proud of. I never once felt like my parents or extended family judged me in that way, and for that I am thankful.

But I didn’t live in a vacuum, I saw society’s expectations, I felt the burden of being bullied. I was reminded regularly that being big and being a woman is a problem. I tried a few diets here and there, but honestly I love food too much to ‘stick’ to anything. I went through a phase of following a hit-diet that emphasized no carbs, and cheat days, and very fucked up views on food. (the diet actually suggested increasing the number of bowel movements on ‘cheat days’ to minimize the number of calories absorbed – um, pretty sure that’s a version of bulimia). I lost a reasonable amount of weight, for me. I remember my mom asking me if I was eating. She was worried. I felt proud. Hey, everyone was noticing how ‘small’ I was, that had never happened to me before!

Looking back on that time, I cringe. I thought I was doing things ‘right’. After all, people are praised and put on pedestals when they ‘stick to’ their diets and lose a significant amount of weight. We don’t talk about how obsessed with food they are, or if they can function outside of planning their meals, or if they can enjoy day-to-day things because it may or may not be ‘on plan’.

So what changed?

I had a baby. I had a newborn to take care of, I had to recover from pregnancy and childbirth, and all on broken sleep. I was exhausted (who isn’t in that stage) and I could feel my emotions so much worse some days than others. There were days when I could feel myself getting frustrated with Nugget so much easier, and I started to analyze why. Yes, sleep was a factor, but that was mostly out of my control. I started realizing when I ate poorly, I felt awful. My patience was thinner, and I was quick to snap on my husband. And it wasn’t like I was eating fast food everyday or ordering pizza, it was just whenever I was out of balance, I felt it.

So I started paying even closer attention to how each food I ate made me feel. Too much bread? Made me so bloated and uncomfortable. Lots of green veggies? So much energy and my digestion felt like it was humming along. Not enough protein? I would get hungry and cranky within hours of eating. I started getting more in tune with my body’s needs. I started craving ‘healthy’ foods. My daily choices started balancing out.

I used to forbid my husband from purchasing any ‘bad’ foods because if it was in the house, I would eat it, and I would eat it all. I would think ‘oh man, I can’t have that, I should eat it all so it’s gone so I don’t have to worry about it anymore’. But now? I know I can have chocolate, or cookies, or ice cream whenever I want, and I do! But I don’t feel the need to polish off 10 servings, because I know that it’s always there whenever I feel like it. I don’t feel deprived, therefore I don’t need to binge. I try to live in an abundance mindset. All the foods are there all of the time whenever I want. There are no ‘bad foods’, nothing is ‘off limits’. There are some foods that make me feel crappy, so I don’t eat them as often, because I don’t like to feel like crap. There are some foods that make me feel great, so I choose those more often.

It’s as complicated and as simple as that.

So I bet you’re reading this and thinking, well shit if I ‘ate whatever I want’ I’d eat the entire pantry and gain 500lbs. Listen, I thought that too. And to be honest, when you start shifting your mindset, it’s totally normal to swing the pendulum to the opposite end of the spectrum and go overboard for a while. Your body will be so used to being deprived perpetually, that it will take some time to re-calibrate your thinking to eat without eating all the things, all the time.

The key is to eat mindfully. Pay attention to how you feel before, during, and after you eat. Before – are you eating because you’re hungry? Bored? Sad? All perfectly okay, just acknowledge it and sit with it. During – are you enjoying what you are eating? Is it making you feel good? Are you full? Do you actually want that next bite, or are you just eating because there is some left? That last one is hard for me, I feel guilty leaving a bite or two behind, but one of my role models (Jennifer Campbell) said in a group we’re members of (I’m paraphrasing) ‘If you eat something, because you feel bad throwing it away, you’re just making yourself the garbage can.” That resonated with me. If I am eating something that I don’t want or need, then how is that any different than throwing it in the garbage? It’s not. And After – an hour or two later, are you feeling stuffed? Bloated and gross? Tired and lazy? or energized and happy? These are all things to help you guide your choices.

Now, this isn’t to say you must always, only eat foods that make you feel perfect, all of the time. No. That’s not the point. The point is balance. So you go to a birthday party, and there’s cake, and you want a piece. You like cake, you want to participate in the event, and it looks tasty. So have a piece! Acknowledge that maybe the cake might make you feel not so great later, so maybe only have one piece. But, consider while you’re eating the cake – is it good? Are you enjoying the cake? Does the serving size feel okay? Are you satisfied after 3 bites? Then stop. If the cake is bloody delicious, and you’re still feeling okay after you finish – then have another piece!

Like I said, complicated, but simple.

Your body is this funny thing. It has these cues that are there for a reason. Hunger, fullness, bloating, energy levels, constipation etc. They all work together to help you decide what to eat.

And you know what? The funny thing is, 14 months after having my first baby, I weigh the same as I did when I was doing that ‘crazy diet’ a few years ago. Except I am so much healthier. I have more muscle, more energy, and most important of all, I don’t obsess about food, like, at all and I love the way my body looks, but I also love the way it feels.

And the best part? I get to eat hot dogs with my son, who absolutely loves hot dogs, every week. And I don’t feel one single ounce of guilt over it, because I am balanced.

How

nutrition, Self Care

What to do About that Dreaded Winter Cold or Flu

Here in YYC, the weather is getting cooler, the leaves are changing, there’s a nip in the air. As much as we’d like to deny it for a few more weeks months, winter is coming.

[cue Game of Thrones reference]

I live in Canada. There is absolutely no question we get full blown, many feet of snow, frigid cold, arctic quality, winter.

I actually love winter.

I know, I know. I’m crazy. But the truth is I just love the changing of the seasons, I love all of them. The short period of each allows me to appreciate the next. If I were to live somewhere where it was always hot, I would probably get depressed because I would not be able to snuggle up in a cozy blanket by the fire and sip on hot cocoa and watch Christmas movies. That would make me sad.

What do I not love about winter?

Flu season. Cold season. General increase in communicable illness in the whole of the population.

Not fun.

You know what’s even less fun? Being sick when pregnant – you can’t take anything! You know what’s even LESS fun than that? Being sick while caring for a newborn! Downright awful! Add onto that the stress and worry that your tiny human will also get sick. It’s the literal worst.

But there are things you can do that can help you stay on the healthier side of things and give your body the best shot at avoiding, or in the very least minimizing the sniffles, sore throat, cough, body aches and general crappy feelings that go along with viral infections.

Now if you ask your friends and family, ‘how do I prevent/get rid of a cold’ you’ll probably be greeted with a myriad of ridiculous sounding suggestions, for example:

‘take a shot of whisky and wear a toque to bed’
‘rub your feet with vicks and wear socks to bed’
‘gargle salt water’
‘take garlic pills’
‘drink a hot toddy – with extra toddy’
My personal favourite – ‘put wet socks in the fridge, then before bed, put them on then cover with wool socks’ – supposedly called ‘warming socks’… Oh Lord… *eyeroll*

I mean, I’m not complaining about the fact that the majority of the suggestions involve alcohol and sleep. But they probably aren’t doing much to support your immune system (well except maybe the sleep, but we’ll get to that).

Most of these claims are based on anecdotal evidence. “Well my mom used to always do XYZ and I always felt better within a few days” or “I always take ABC supplements and I never get sick”.

Let’s look at the first one – most colds last 5-10 days. Usually most people are in denial of their illness within the first day or two, then they acknowledge it, but don’t feel too bad, then they feel worse and finally start looking for a ‘cure’, they try XYZ and miraculously they feel better! Well did XYZ cure them, or did they just happen to try XYZ right before their virus was due to run its course?

Ya, think about that one.

So what can you do to help with the cold or flu?

What does science say?

  1. Take Probiotics
    There’s a lot of information out there about probiotics and the human microbiome right now.There’s been a recent shift in thinking to ‘germs are bad’ to ‘too many of the wrong kind of germs are bad’. You see our entire body is covered and filled with germs, and the majority of those germs live within your digestive tract, and help our bodies break down the food we eat. Recent research has found that a good balance of bacteria within the body can even help support our immune system. A 2014 study showed that taking probiotics allowed participants to decrease the frequency and duration of viral illnesses. The participants reported that although they still felt sick, when they got sick, it lasted a shorter period of time, and they reported illnesses less frequently than the group that did not receive probiotic therapy.
    Now I personally take a probiotic supplement daily, and give a baby version to Nugget, there are also many dietary sources to get beneficial bacteria through the food you eat. Things like yogurt, kefir, sauerkraut (make sure it’s fermented) kimchi and, little known, honey (make sure it’s unpasteurized)!
  2. Don’t fight the fever*
    Ever wonder why we get a fever when we get sick? Well it’s not what you think. The most commonly held belief is that it helps basically ‘cook’ the virus or bacteria that is causing the infection, and this is not true. If that were the case, you wouldn’t have to cook your food to kill bacteria! Fever and increased body temperature actually improve your body’s immune response buy allowing certain types of your white blood cells to become more efficient at attacking the infection. Hyperthermia, while it doesn’t kill the viruses, does inhibit their replication, or ‘viral shedding’, which can help limit the duration of the cold or flu symptoms.So while it’s perfectly reasonable to take ibuprofen or acetaminophen to relieve symptoms like aches or pains, it’s not necessary to bring down a fever just for the sake of it. Mayo Clinic suggests that a fever less than 39.5C (103F) is not worrisome in an adult, so if you’re temperature is less than that, leave it alone!

    *The exception to this is if you are pregnant – fever in pregnancy can potentially harm the developing fetus – please treat the fever with acetaminophen and speak with your care provider!
  3. Eat chicken soup
    You probably thought this one was filed up there with the ‘old wives tales’, but there is actually science behind it! One study showed that the combination of ingredients in chicken soup limited the inflammatory response of neutrophils (a type of white blood cell), which is responsible for most of the unpleasant symptoms of a cold or flu. Also, inhaling the warm vapours and drinking the warm fluids associated with chicken soup help loosen mucous in the nose and chest, making them easier to clear (which is why your nose runs when you eat soup).
  4. Eat nutrient dense foods
    It’s no surprise that our bodies require nutrients to function. Our nutrition needs to consist of more than just fats, carbohydrates and proteins. There is a plethora of micronutrients that our bodies require in order to function properly, like vitamins and minerals. The best source for these is through the food we eat, fruits and vegetables, no or low processed foods. The more a food is processed, the less nutrition it contains.
  5. Sleep
    Sleep is how our body recouperates. It kind of seems obvious that it would be even more important when our body is fighting off an infection that sleep would be even more important. Animal studies have shown that all animals engage in more sleep when they are ill, it is the natural thing to do. Sleep also helps reduce stress, which contributes to improved immune system function. So rest up!

So now you know. When you are feeling ill, and someone suggests you put on cold wet socks (still laughing about that one), you can retort with science. The actual facts about what to do when you are feeling ill, and how to minimize the likelihood that you will become sick in the first place!

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